I thought my brother was joking yesterday when, as I was making hash brown casserole for Christmas dinner, he said, "George Michael died". Just the night before we were talking about Carrie Fisher's condition after her heart attack. Alan Thicke's death was still fresh. The deaths of Prince, David Bowie, Arnold Palmer, Muhammed Ali, Glenn Frey, Gene Wilder, and so many others I am forgetting at the moment have made 2016 more notable for high profile celebrity deaths than any other.
But this one jarred me at a deeper level.
I texted my friend, "It gives me chills to think of listening to 'Last Christmas'." Yes, the man who wrote 'Last Christmas', a perennial pop favorite, and even covered by Taylor Swift, died on Christmas Day. His last Christmas.
We enjoyed the rest of our Christmas night, and when I got home, I started watching George Michael videos and downloaded more music.
When I woke up this morning and unlocked my iPad, I realized that I had fallen asleep to the video for "Do They Know It's Christmas?", the Band-Aid song from 1984 done as a benefit for Africa by musicians from Europe. Of course George Michael was involved. At the time, he was riding the wave of success from the release of "Careless Whisper" a few months earlier. That next February, "Careless Whisper" hit #1 in the US and stayed there for three weeks. It was later named the number-one song of 1985. I remember it clearly. My friend and I would listen to the countdown on the radio on Sunday nights. Her favorite song was "Can't Fight This Feeling" by REO Speedwagon, and mine was "Careless Whisper". They were both at the top, battling each other for #1. This morning, I was watching some of the Today show and they were asking each other their favorite George Michael song. It's a hard choice, because they're all good, but then again, not so much. "Careless Whisper" was my first favorite, and still is.
A few years after, a different friend and I were obsessed, you could say, with George Michael. We would listen to his music, watch his videos, and even got black hats and gold hoop earrings to emulate his style. I had his poster on my wall. I remember buying the cassette tape of "Faith" in Abbotsford, B.C. when our Jr. High band was up there for a competition. I wore that tape out. LOVED it so much. I remember even then, being so impressed that he had written, produced, and sang all of these songs. These songs that were speeding up the charts and the videos that were always on MTV and VH-1. His voice, to this day, is still, I think, one of the best ever. So smooth, so soulful, he had an amazing range. From ballads to funky dance songs. A touch of jazz and gospel. So talented.
This morning as I was cleaning up the kitchen, I put on my George Michael playlist. I was thinking about why this celebrity death was impacting me so much. I mean, it's not like I knew him personally, my day to day life isn't going to be affected. But it is a loss to me. A part of my life, the music that was such a huge part of my growing up, has died. I am also feeling the added impact of this happening on Christmas, at the end of the season where I've already been pondering the loss of the innocence of childhood- when my mom did all the work and for me, it was all about having a long break from school and waiting for Santa.
This last Christmas was indeed a last Christmas. And I will never hear a George Michael song the same way again.
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